Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Coverall Code

I would like to think that I am not superstitious. Most superstitions seem petty and silly but if I am honest I would admit to having a few myself. Things like if wearing the same exact clothes from one ballgame to the next when I was playing and (if I am going to be totally honest) when I was coaching youth sports. Silly things like not stepping on the baseline when walking onto the field in a baseball game. Even now, if my favorite team is winning when I start watching the game and start to do poorly I will stop watching because, obviously, it was my turning the game on that made things go badly.

Sports are one thing but real life is another and even then, I must admit that I have superstitions when it comes to my daily life. If things are going good I try not to talk about them because when I do my fortune seems to change. If I have had a string of bad luck I will change my routine up to help change my luck up and when it does I stay with that routine until I talk about it too much and have to change again. Remember I said superstitions are petty, silly and don’t make sense.

My main, number one superstition is with my chore clothes. During lambing and calving I do not wash my coveralls. This is both rooted in superstition and practicality. Practicality from the stand point that every time you wash chore clothes sort of accident will happen and you will end up just as dirty as before you washed them and this usually happens the first time you wear them.

I guess that also works into the superstition part of the equation. If you wash your coveralls something bad will happen (and get them dirty again). So, I only wash my coveralls sparingly during this time of the year and only after the rest of my family has had an intervention (or Jennifer has just thrown them into the washer daring fate). I cringe as I put on freshly laundered coveralls, knowing that some calamity is about to rear its ugly head.

That is what is making my current dilemma maddening. The ice storm that didn’t happen really did a number on my coveralls. OK, so it was me tripping over the wagon I left out and falling into the mud that caused most of the damage. I would put my coveralls on and they would seem like they weighed twenty extra pounds because of all the wet mud on the legs. However, as the mud dried up in the lots, the legs of my coveralls dried up and just became stiff and crusty.

Lambing season is hard on my cleanliness too. Carrying fresh lambs from one barn to the next and wiping my hands off on the legs adds to the coating of grime and gunk. Pulling lambs, wrestling with the ewes and cleaning pens all take the toll on the sanitary state of my coveralls. I try not to wear them into public this time of the year but when I do I notice the stares of the people around me. Apparently, they do not know or care about the horrible fate that I am saving staving off by making the sacrifice.

To make matters worse this week, I was carrying a lamb from one pen to another. I take the utmost care to make sure the lambs are safe. As I was transporting the lamb, it made a deposit right on and in the front pocket of my bibs. It just so happened to be the pocket I carry my phone in. I was completely oblivious to this until my daughter pointed it out to me. The phone was easily cleaned off and I have almost forgot about it each time I put it up to my face to make a call.

I scrapped the excess gooey excrement off the front of my coveralls and soon it dried leaving only a tell-tale yellowish stain. It was the part that went into the pocket and mixed with the alfalfa leaves, feed and other dirt that caused the biggest problem. I scraped it out the best I could with my pocket knife but the odor lingered. What should I do?

Luckily the weather was nice the next two days following this incident insuring that everything dried nicely. Sure, the coveralls were a little stiff but my good luck remained and I decided not to wash them and tempt fate. With only eight more weeks of lambing and calving to go it will be nip and tuck as to whether I can make it the remainder of the season without breaking down and give into the growing mob demanding a washing. But if I do weaken and give in, it should make for a good story. Of course, maybe by talking about it I will scare off the bad luck.

No comments:

Post a Comment