Transistions In Life

Its amazing how time marches on and I often wonder why instead of a slow steady march, time seems to have decided to pick it up to double time. It seems as though we just started April and it is already May. Part of this might be because we were stuck in February or March for the past three months. In any case we are into May and I am not at all ready. Time, however, does not seem to care about my feelings and is moving on at a rapid pace.

Because of the rotten weather I am so far behind on my farm work that I might not ever catch up. The corn should be in the ground., fences should be fixed, and the pastures should eagerly be waiting on the cows. None of that is anywhere near done. I had my time completely scheduled and I don’t have time or room in that schedule for changes. It is like time does not know this is Tatum’s senior year.

Ah yes, Tatum’s senior year. Another example of how time does not work on my schedule. My kids should not be old enough to be in college, I wasn’t done enjoying their time in sports, 4-H and FFA, again it seems like my schedule and my sense of time were not consulted. At very least we should not be looking at the last couple of weeks of Tatum’s high school career. This is all going by way too fast, I just wish I could stick a foot out and slow the merry-go-round of life down just a little bit.

It’s funny how our perspective on life changes as time goes by. I remember Isaac’s senior year and I don’t remember being quite this melancholy and I feel bad about that. I guess it was because I knew I still had a kid in high school and all the last moments were not the total last moments. Down deep inside I knew that I still had a couple of years of transition left. Then I blinked and all the sudden we are looking at the last few moments as parents of a high school student.

I guess life is about transition. I barely remember the transition of graduating high school and becoming a college student. Then graduating college and moving out into the real world. The next big transition was from being single to married. Along came kids and another transition, then the kids were in school and now we are staring at the transition to being empty nesters. During each of these monumental life changes I promised myself to enjoy the moment and the transition, so I could remember what that point in my life felt like.

I must admit that I am a pretty conflicted person right now. The farmer in me is screaming that I have no time for anything but trying to catch up with the never-ending list of what needs to be done. Crops must be planted, cows must go to pasture and the sheep need to be worked. Those tasks can’t be ignored and really shouldn’t be put off. I need to keep my nose to the grindstone and stay home.

Then the Dad part kicks in. Last night we attended Tatum’s last District FFA Banquet and watched her retire as a District FFA officer. I rode with her on the way home and she mentioned to me that the only current leadership position she held was student body president and that election was next week. Only a handful of softball games, a couple of state FFA contests, a few spring livestock shows, and graduation remained on the calendar. Suddenly the pull of work did not seem so important.

I look at my calendar and I realize that the final home stretch of high school is right here. Sure, it has been a long, tiring race but who wants to walk across the line? A couple of weeks and it will all be over. I want to go to each event, savor the moment and enjoy the last couple of hours of being the parent of a high school student. I know the work I need to get done is important, but I am also just as sure that it will get done in time and, God willing, I will have plenty more crops to plant and springs to get cows worked and out to grass.

Right now, it seems like it is more important to be there for all the last times and soak up all the memories. I don’t want to look back in a couple of months and wish I had not missed those moments. That is the struggle. After all, I keep telling myself, there will be plenty of time to rest next year when we transition into empty nesters. Right?